Sunday 22 July 2012

Kontiki Fondles Girl's Breasts

Well-respected conductor Norbert Kontiki has been accused of fondling a girl's breasts at the recent Quagmire Too Far Away Contest at Sherbet-on-Sea.

17-year-old wannabee model Skye Logan said, "I spent £2,000 having my tits done, then I got hair extensions and stuff. Next thing I know I'm in Sherbet-on-Sea doing a promotional shoot for Hambleton Holiday Homes and this seedy bloke comes up and accidentally brushes against my tits whilst he's pushing past me in the bar. I felt so violated like when I posed for that lads mag with my labia almost bursting my g-string".

Kontiki, conductor of the Fentenbury Saxhorn Band and of 14 Tulisa Terrace, Leominster, who's mobile number is 08778 543971, was unavailable for comment.