Group Captain Boothby St. Claire has announced that he has accepted the role of Musical Director with the Torbay Band.
St. Claire told the Bandstand, "People will know of my high profile departure from the Bournemouth Grenadiers Band due to artistic differences (that and being caught shagging the principal cornet player's wife)".
"I now relish the challenge of taking the Torbay Band to the next level. I bet Bournemouth Grenadiers are fucking fuming. Tough shit, I'm coming to get you Bournemouth Grenadiers. I can't wait for the Torquay Invitational Contest at the Spice Girls Museum, Torquay (tickets £3.50 or £5.00 on the door if not pre-booked). I'm gonna fucking have you and that fat bitch who wouldn't leave her husband when it came to the crunch. She was shit in bed anyway".
It should be a cracking contest.
